132. Broads Coaches: Why Women Were Never Meant to Stay Small
Why Women Were Never Meant to Stay Small
There’s a moment in this episode that hits hard: training starts to feel heavy when the goal is shrinking instead of becoming capable. And honestly? That line alone explains why so many women feel stuck, frustrated, and disconnected from their bodies.
This episode dives deep into something bigger than fitness, it’s about identity, confidence, and the quiet ways diet culture keeps women playing small. Tara gets real about the patterns she’s seeing in clients, the industry, and even in everyday conversations. What seems like a harmless goal, “just lose a little weight”, often turns into a cycle that chips away at self-trust and long-term progress.
If you’re a coach, or someone trying to build a stronger relationship with your body, this conversation is the wake-up call you didn’t know you needed.
The Real Problem: Shrinking as the Goal
A major theme in this episode is how deeply rooted the idea of “being smaller” is for women.
Not just physically smaller, but quieter, less visible, less powerful.
Tara points out how this shows up in fitness goals all the time:
“I don’t want to get bulky”
“I just want to tone”
“I want to lose weight, not gain”
At the surface, these sound normal. But underneath? There’s fear. Fear of taking up space. Fear of being seen. Fear of stepping outside what’s been socially accepted.
And here’s the problem: when the goal is always to shrink, progress becomes limited. Strength feels threatening. Fueling your body feels wrong. And confidence never fully lands.
Diet Culture Isn’t Loud Anymore, It’s Subtle
One of the most powerful insights from the episode is how diet culture has evolved.
It’s not always obvious anymore. It doesn’t always look like strict meal plans or extreme restrictions. Instead, it shows up in quiet, sneaky ways:
Avoiding certain foods without questioning why
Feeling guilty for eating more
Celebrating under-eating as “discipline”
Constantly trying to “balance out” meals
Tara breaks down how these behaviors slowly erode confidence over time. Not overnight, but consistently enough that women start to lose trust in their own bodies.
And that’s the real damage: not just physical, but mental.
Because once self-trust is gone, everything feels harder, training, nutrition, decision-making, all of it.
Strength Requires a Mindset Shift
Another key takeaway? You can’t build strength with a “stay small” mindset.
Strength, real strength, requires:
Eating enough
Taking up space in the gym
Letting go of constant control
Being okay with change
That’s uncomfortable for a lot of women. And that discomfort is exactly where growth happens.
Tara emphasizes that becoming capable is a completely different goal than becoming smaller. It shifts the focus from appearance to performance. From restriction to support. From fear to confidence.
And once that shift happens? Everything changes.
Coaches: You’re Shaping More Than Workouts
This episode speaks directly to coaches in a big way.
Because coaching isn’t just about programming, it’s about influence.
The language you use, the goals you encourage, the behaviors you normalize… they all matter.
If a client says they don’t want to get “too big,” it’s easy to just nod and move on. But Tara challenges that. She pushes for deeper conversations:
Where is that fear coming from?
What does “too big” actually mean?
What are they really trying to achieve?
Because often, what clients say they want isn’t the full story.
And as a coach, you have the opportunity to guide them toward something better, not just physically, but mentally.
The Confidence Gap
One of the underlying threads in this episode is confidence, or the lack of it.
When women are constantly trying to shrink, they’re also holding themselves back in other areas:
Speaking up
Taking risks
Going after bigger goals
It’s all connected.
Tara highlights how building physical strength can directly impact confidence outside the gym. Lifting heavier, fueling properly, and pushing limits doesn’t just change your body, it changes how you see yourself.
And that confidence? It carries over into everything.
Rewriting the Goal: From Smaller to Stronger
So what’s the alternative?
Instead of asking, “How can I be smaller?”The question becomes, “What am I capable of?”
That shift alone can transform the entire fitness journey.
It opens the door to:
Eating to support performance
Training with purpose
Celebrating progress beyond the scale
Building real, lasting confidence
It also removes the constant pressure to “fix” your body, and replaces it with the desire to support it.
Key Takeaways
Let’s break it down:
Shrinking isn’t a sustainable goal. It limits growth and reinforces fear-based thinking.
Diet culture is subtle but powerful. It shows up in everyday habits and slowly erodes self-trust.
Strength requires letting go of control. You can’t build capability while trying to stay small.
Coaches play a huge role. The way you guide clients can either reinforce or challenge limiting beliefs.
Confidence is built through action. Physical strength often leads to mental strength.
Ready to Take Up Space?
This episode isn’t just about fitness, it’s about rewriting the narrative.
Women were never meant to stay small. Not in their bodies, their goals, or their lives.
So here’s the real question:
Where in your life are you still trying to shrink, and what would change if you stopped?
If this hit, take it into your next workout, your next client conversation, or your next decision. Show up bigger. Train stronger. And start acting like the space you take up actually matters, because it does.
